Invasion U.S.A. (1985) Cannon/Action RT: 110 minutes Rated R (strong violence, language, drugs) Director: Joseph Zito Screenplay: Chuck Norris and James Bruner Music: Jay Chattaway Cinematography: Joao Fernandes Release date: September 27, 1985 (US) Cast: Chuck Norris, Richard Lynch, Melissa Prophet, Alexander Zale, Alex Colon, Eddie Jones, Jon DeVries, James O’Sullivan, Billy Drago, Jaime Sanchez, Dehl Berti, Stephen Markle, Shane McCamey, Martin Shakar, James Pax. Box Office: $17.5M (US)
Rating: ***
Invasion U.S.A. is one of the dumbest action movies I’ve ever seen. How dumb is it? Let me give you an example. A character states there hasn’t been a foreign attack on American soil in over 200 years. Say what now? Have you never heard of Pearl Harbor? Does the date December 7, 1941 ring a bell? I know Hawaii wasn’t yet a state in ’41, but doesn’t an American naval base count as “American soil”? In any event, it shows tremendous laziness on the writers’ part when they can’t even be bother to get their historical facts straight.
Directed by Joseph Zito (Missing in Action), Invasion U.S.A. has an intriguing premise. What if terrorists decide to attack America? It’s in perfect keeping with the jingoistic, xenophobic spirit of the 80s when we lived in fear of an attack by our Soviet enemies. Of course, it could never really happen, could it? Although the events of 9/11 ultimately proved otherwise, such a thing seemed inconceivable when this movie came out in ’85. However, being that it’s a Cannon movie, it’s reduced to a Chuck Norris one-man army action fantasy.
Invasion U.S.A. opens with a boatload of Cuban refugees being gunned down by Latin American guerillas disguised as U.S. Coast Guard. Their leader is a Russian named Rostov (Lynch, The Sword and the Sorcerer) and it’s his intention to stage a series of terrorist attacks in the good old U.S. of A. First, he has to take care of some personal business. He wants to eliminate an old enemy, former CIA operative Matt Hunter (Norris), before he can interfere. The short version, he misses. Hunter agrees to help stop Rostov with the proviso that the Agency lets him do it alone.
With Hunter out of the way (or so he thinks), Rostov begins his campaign of terror by blowing up houses on a quiet suburban street where everybody is getting ready for Christmas. It’s a Rockwell painting turned into a Beirut scenario. Ho, ho, ho, indeed. Rostov and his army create total chaos by turning American citizens against law enforcement and each other. They attack shopping malls, school buses and church services. Each time, Hunter is there to foil their plans. He somehow manages to always be in the right place at the right time. Only in action movies, right?
Earlier in ’85, Norris starred in Code of Silence, a surprisingly intelligent, energetic and exciting cop actioner. He showed great promise in it. Invasion U.S.A. is a return to form for the martial artist-turned-actor. He’s as wooden as ever. He strides around with automatic weapons strapped to both sides like a modern-day cowboy barely interacting with anybody except when he’s shooting them or blowing them up. When he does talk, it’s typically tough guy dialogue that comes out of his mouth- e.g. “I’ll hit you with so many rights, you’ll be begging for a left.” He crosses paths a few times with a freelance photojournalist (Prophet, Van Nuys Blvd.) with apparent anger issues. She’s always yelling at somebody- cops, feds, security guards, even Hunter himself. She doesn’t even appreciate it when he literally saves her life. Instead, she insults him and hurls a garbage can lid at him. You know what she doesn’t do? Her job. Not once does she file a story or photograph. She hardly takes any pictures at all. She ultimately serves no purpose to the plot. It’s a thankless role really. Lynch hams it up shamelessly as the maniacal villain. He’s actually the best part of the picture.
It’s not enough that the makers of Invasion U.S.A. expect us to believe Norris always shows up in time to prevent some terrible act of terrorism. No matter, it’s the main foundation the genre is built on anyway. They take it a step farther by suggesting that Hunter’s CIA contact is capable of arranging a complicated and elaborate set-up to capture Rostov and his army in a matter of hours. An op like that would realistically take months of careful and precise planning not to mention all the interagency cooperation it would require. I know action movies don’t reflect reality, but this is a pretty big ask.
To be fair, Invasion U.S.A. has a few decent action scenes like when Norris drives his pick-up through a crowded shopping mall in pursuit of a bomber. LOL! I kept waiting for Jake and Elwood to join the chase. The main problem with Invasion U.S.A. is the lack of narrative. It’s more like a series of violent action set-pieces put together to resemble a movie. There are huge gaping plot holes and moments of great incredulity. It’s incredibly lazy. However, I wouldn’t say it’s terrible. It’s just laughable. It’s probably not PC to make light of terrorism, but when Chuck Norris is the solution, I can’t help but sit back and chuckle at the silliness of it all.
FUNNY STORY: I saw Invasion U.S.A. at a Sunday matinee with my dad. Two old ladies were sitting just across the aisle. They looked out of place at a Chuck Norris action flick. I was tempted to tell them Agnes of God was playing at another theater, but decided to stay quiet. My impression turned out to be right on the money. They gasped and exclaimed “Oh, my God!” whenever something violent happened. In a Chuck Norris movie, that’s roughly every five minutes. They left not long after the attack on the residential street. I still wonder if they found the theater showing Agnes of God.
