Ernest Saves Christmas (1988) Touchstone/Comedy RT: 95 minutes Rated PG (slapstick violence) Director: John Cherry Screenplay: B. Kline and Ed Turner Music: Mark Snow Cinematography: Peter Stein Release date: November 11, 1988 (US) Cast: Jim Varney, Douglas Seale, Oliver Clark, Noelle Parker, Gailard Sartain, Billie Bird, Bill Byrge, Robert Lesser. Box Office: $28.2M (US)
Rating: ***
If Ernest can save a summer camp from a mean real estate developer, he can surely save the most joyous time of the time. In Ernest Saves Christmas, Jim Varney reprises his role of the simple-minded, rubber-faced country bumpkin Ernest P. Worrell who invariably makes a mess out of every situation. This time around, Ernest nearly destroys Christmas when he finds himself in possession of Santa’s magic sack. Ever notice it’s never a genius these things happen to?
According to Ernest Saves Christmas, “Santa Claus” is actually a title that gets handed down to another person every 100 years. The current title holder (Seale, Amadeus) is ready to retire as he’s becoming forgetful at 151 years old. It takes a very special person to wear the red suit, somebody like Joe Carruthers (Clark, A Star is Born), the host of a children’s show that’s just been cancelled. His agent Marty (Lesser, Die Hard) finds him another acting gig in a violent horror movie called Christmas Slay. Of course, he’s not comfortable starring in a movie like that. It doesn’t set a good example for children.
In his second movie, we find Ernest driving a taxi cab in Orlando. He picks up an elderly passenger (Seale, Amadeus) at the airport. The guy turns out to be Santa in town on business. He’s here to turn over the reins of the sleigh to Joe who naturally doesn’t believe the old man. Along the way, they pick up another passenger, a teenage runaway calling herself Harmony Starr (Parker, Seven Minutes in Heaven).
Ernest gets fired because he allowed the old man to ride for free after seeing that he only had play money on him. He also finds himself holding Santa’s magic sack after he accidentally left it in the trunk. He sets out with Harmony to return it to its rightful owner who’s sitting in a jail cell thanks to Marty who reports him as a mental case to keep him away from Joe. To save Christmas, they have to break Santa out of jail and help him convince Joe he and the job offer are the real deal. Time is a crucial factor as they have only until 7pm on Christmas Eve to make Joe the new Santa or else all the magic of Christmas will disappear.
Meanwhile, some mysterious packages have arrived at the airport storage facility. Somebody named “Mr. Elves” is supposed to pick them up. The curious agents at the facility watch as reindeer emerge from the boxes and walk around on the ceiling. That’s something you don’t see every day. If you do, you should probably lower the dose on your meds.
Few things in life are certain- death, taxes and Ernest driving the sleigh at some point in Ernest Saves Christmas. We all know how that will turn out. We also know that Ernest will pay a visit to his never-seen buddy Vern and make a bloody mess of his home. It makes you wonder why he never took out a restraining order against Ernest. In other words, it’s a completely predictable Ernest comedy. Somehow it still works. It’s incredibly stupid, but I don’t recall it promising something on the level of Chaplin.
Ernest Saves Christmas is the second movie featuring the dimwitted character that starred in dozens of TV commercials before making the transition to film. It’s not as good as Ernest Goes to Camp which I thought was a pleasant surprise. This one is funny too, but director John Cherry doubles down on the idiocy this time around. Thus we get many, many close-up shots of Ernest’s face as he bumbles through various situations that he makes worse due to his lack of intelligence.
At this point, I’d like to ask a question about the Ernest character. Is he supposed to be mentally challenged? It seems like the most logical explanation pertaining to his behavior. If this turns out to be the case, should we really be laughing at him? Isn’t it tantamount to laughing at children in special ed classes at any given elementary school? I hate to bring PC into it, but you all know how much I love playing devil’s advocate. You know what, forget I asked. Let’s just enjoy the guy’s asinine antics.
The highlights of Ernest Saves Christmas (such as they are) include a prolonged scene of Ernest in drag (Varney’s Auntie Nelda character) trying to bluff his way into Marty’s office. He also poses as a redneck snake wrangler in order to sneak onto the lot where the horror movie is being filmed. What security guard in their right mind would allow such a person to get past them? This movie assumes that everybody encountered by Ernest is a complete idiot and it’s easy for him to get over on them. I find it difficult to believe that even one person is dumber and more gullible than Ernest, but that’s the world according to Ernest P. Worrell. I’d hate to think the makers are trying to make a statement about the decline of American intelligence.
I definitely laughed more than I should have at Ernest Saves Christmas. I couldn’t help it; it’s just so darn silly. I didn’t always like this movie, but I’ve developed an appreciation for it over the years. It’s kind of funny seeing a grown man making silly faces for the camera. The idea of a new person assuming the role of Santa Claus every 100 years is somewhat clever. The late Varney is as good as one would expect. Ernest was his trademark character and he performed it with aplomb and enthusiasm, you can’t ask for much more than that.
The other actors in this movie look like they’re having fun. Parker is a delight as the cynical 80s teen who no longer believes in Santa. Naturally, she has a total change of heart by the end. Seale is good as the outgoing Santa who finds a chance at a new start with an older museum employee (Bird, Police Academy 4). Clark is also pretty good as the doubting Thomas guy in line for the greatest gig in the world.
Ernest Saves Christmas has the distinction of being the highest grossing Ernest film. None of the subsequent ones released to theaters- Ernest Goes to Jail (1990), Ernest Scared Stupid (1991) and Ernest Rides Again (1993)- did too well. After that, his other adventures went straight to video. I saw a couple of them and believe me when I say you aren’t missing anything.
I wouldn’t call Ernest Saves Christmas a beloved holiday classic on the level of A Christmas Story, Christmas Vacation or The Muppet Christmas Carol. It’s more of a demented delight along the lines of Santa with Muscles. It’s not fine cinema, but it’s good for a few chuckles while you enjoy some eggnog (the spiked kind, of course). KnowwhutImean?
