Santa Claus: The Movie (1985) TriStar/Fantasy-Adventure RT: 108 minutes Rated PG (some mildly frightening moments, children in peril) Director: Jeannot Szwarc Screenplay: David Newman Music: Henry Mancini Cinematography: Arthur Ibbetson Release date: November 27, 1985 (US) Cast: David Huddleston, Dudley Moore, John Lithgow, Judy Cornwell, Burgess Meredith, Jeffrey Kramer, Christian Fitzpatrick, Carrie Kei Heim, John Barrard, Anthony O’Donnell. Box Office: $23.7M (US)
Rating: ***
Santa Claus as a superhero, one who comes to the rescue in the nick of time, one who rides during the off-season? Okay, I never thought of the big jolly one that way, but seeing that Santa Claus: The Movie is the brainchild of producers Alexander and Ilya Salkind (the Superman movies, Supergirl), I shouldn’t be at all surprised.
Directed by Jeannot Szwarc (Supergirl), its structure resembles that of the first Superman movie. The first half is an origin story that explains how a 14th century woodcutter became Santa Claus. The second half has Santa foiling a nefarious plan concocted by an evil villain. I know it’s colossally silly, but I enjoyed it anyway. It’s a holiday “so bad, it’s great” guilty pleasure.
Santa Claus: The Movie opens with Claus (Huddleston, Blazing Saddles) delivering toys to the children of a nearby village on Christmas Eve. With his wife Anya (Cornwell, Keeping Up Appearances) by his side, they set out in a blizzard and get lost. His two reindeer Donner and Blitzen collapse and it looks like they’ll all freeze to death right there. Instead, they’re transported to a magical place where they’re greeted by the vendegum (aka elves) led by wise head elf Dooley (Barrard, King David). He tells the confused couple they’ve been waiting a long time for their arrival. Claus has been chosen to deliver toys to all the children of the world. It’s a big job and it’s going to take a big man to do it.
Several burning questions about Santa Claus are addressed and answered. How can one man perform such a monumental task in a single night? The simple answer, magic! Time stands still on Christmas Eve so Santa can get the job done. What makes the reindeer fly? Their feed has a special magic ingredient that gives them the gift of flight.
On his first time out, the “Ancient One” (Meredith, Rocky), the oldest of the elves, comes out and bestows the name of Santa Claus upon the kindly woodcutter. Centuries go by and we see Santa come up with the idea of the “naughty or nice” list. He assures Dooley that he’ll be checking it twice.
Eventually, the scene shifts to present day 1985 where greedy toymaker B.Z. (Lithgow, Cliffhanger) faces a mountain of legal troubles due to his dangerous and shoddy products. The consumer bureau forces him to remove ALL of his products from the toy stores around the country. He’s facing bankruptcy and has to come up with something that will improve his public image. More about that later.
Back at the North Pole, Santa feels overwhelmed by his many duties and decides to appoint an assistant. The two main candidates are Patch (Moore, Arthur), an elf with many innovative ideas about how to increase productivity and Puffy (O’Donnell, Vera Drake) who feels things should remain the way they’ve been for centuries. In order to make a final decision, Santa tells them whoever makes the most toys in one day will get the promotion. Patch sets up an automated assembly line while Puffy and his team build toys by hand. In the end, Patch has the biggest pile of toys and receives the promotion. Unfortunately, his toys are substandard. They fall apart immediately after the children start to play with them. For the first time, Santa Claus gets returns. He’s completely stunned.
After overhearing Santa and Dooley discuss how to handle the matter, Patch resigns his commission and leaves the North Pole. He finds himself in 20th century New York where he looks for a toy-making job. After seeing a news story about B.Z. and seeing his products being removed from store windows, Patch concludes he must be very successful. He shows up in the greedy businessman’s office with a brilliant idea. He has a supply of the magic dust that gets sprinkled on the reindeer feed. With it, he creates a lollipop that will make children fly. Because of the inferior products of the previous Christmas, Santa’s popularity is down. B.Z. intends to take advantage of the big guy’s current public relations problems.
It’s a good thing Santa has some loyal friends in New York, namely a homeless boy named Joe (Fitzpatrick) and a rich girl named Cornelia (Heim). Coincidentally (is it?), Cornelia’s step-uncle is B.Z. and it’s because of this that she and Joe learn his true intentions. He wants to take over Christmas and become the greatest toy manufacturer in the world. Never mind that the product is faulty. It explodes when exposed to heat. B.Z. and his flunky Towzer (Kramer, Jaws 1 & 2) capture Joe and tie him up in the basement so he can’t tell anybody. Cornelia writes a letter to Santa who comes to the rescue in his trusty sleigh pulled by six reindeer (the other two are down with reindeer flu).
Santa Claus: The Movie will never be regarded as any kind of film classic with its cheesy special effects and sets. The workshop at the North Pole looks like it was designed and built by Fisher Price. What’s really interesting (and somewhat incredulous) is that the producers spent around $50 million on it. I have to admit though; the sight of Santa’s sleigh flying around New York buildings and landmarks is pretty cool. It’s a no-brainer for the Salkinds. They made audiences believe a man can fly, why not a man and eight reindeer?
As jolly St. Nick, Huddleston conveys such warmth and joy that it’s impossible to imagine anybody else in the role. Whereas other actors might look no more convincing than the guy at the local mall, Huddleston looks like he could be the real thing. Lithgow hams it up mightily as the cartoonish villain in much the same way Gene Hackman did in the Superman movies. He’s a sinister character, but you can’t take him seriously. Cornwell is exactly how I picture Mrs. Claus, a sweet, cheerful old woman who also loves children and takes good care of her husband. Moore makes a good elf. He gets off some decent puns as he talks about “elf confidence” and “elf respect”.
Santa Claus: The Movie is a lot of fun. Children should be enthralled with its vision of Santa’s workshop at the North Pole. Moreover, they’ll love that it answers some of their questions about Santa’s operation. Perhaps it will make them believe in him just a little bit longer. This movie came out when I was a senior in high school. It’s one of the few kid’s movies I actually went to see at the cinema. As a teenager, I wouldn’t be caught dead at some stupid G-rated movie or anything that didn’t contain sex and/or violence (ah yes, the teenage mind!). I thought it looked pretty cool and I was right.
I still enjoy watching Santa Claus: The Movie every year. It brings back that sense of wonder I had as a little boy who thoroughly believed in the myth and tried to stay awake long enough to hear the pitter-patter of hooves on my roof. Although I never considered the big guy could save the world like a red-suited Superman, I suppose anything is possible in the universe of legendary figures. Besides, Santa Claus did conquer the Martians in the 60s so a maniacal toy manufacturer shouldn’t be too difficult to defeat.
Santa Claus: The Movie is totally goofy and 100% corny, but there’s some fun to be had if you’re in the right frame of mind.
