Wildcats (1986) Warner Bros./Comedy RT: 107 minutes Rated R (pervasive strong language, crude humor, nudity, some sports violence, teen drinking) Director: Michael Ritchie Screenplay: Ezra Sacks Music: James Newton Howard Cinematography: Donald E. Thorin Release date: February 14, 1986 (US) Cast: Goldie Hawn, Swoosie Kurtz, Robyn Lively, Brandy Gold, James Keach, Jan Hooks, Bruce McGill, Nipsey Russell, M. Emmett Walsh, Mykel T. Williamson, Tab Thacker, Wesley Snipes, Nick Corri, Woody Harrelson, Willie J. Walton, Rodney Hill. Box Office: $26.2M (US)
Rating: ****
Even though I’m not a sports fan, I do enjoy a good sports comedy. My personal favorite is the outrageous hockey comedy Slap Shot, but Wildcats runs a very, VERY close second. That’s because it stars the gifted comedienne Goldie Hawn (Private Benjamin) as the new football coach at Central High, an institution of higher learning that makes The Blackboard Jungle look like Romper Room. This movie is, in a word, HILARIOUS!
All her life, Molly McGrath has dreamed of being a football coach. She’s more than qualified. Her father was a famed football coach; she knows everything there is to know about the game. Due to the sexist ideals of the time, she coaches the girls’ track team at an affluent high school. When a position opens up on the junior varsity team, she pleads with the sexist varsity coach Dan Darwell (McGill, Animal House) to give her a chance. Instead, he gives the job to the super-gay home economics teacher because he’s a man. By way of “compensation”, he gives her the option of coaching varsity at Central, a tough, inner city school in Chicago. He thinks she’ll turn down the job, but she gladly accepts it to his surprise.
It’s not exactly the dream job Molly was expecting. Her welcoming party is a vicious guard dog that chases her through the halls. The principal, Ben Edwards (Russell, The Wiz), informs her resources like assistant coaches are non-existent. The Wildcats, a collection of thugs and misfits, haven’t won a game in years. Molly is nevertheless determined to whip them into shape. Naturally, they resent her at first and try to scare her off. Not one to be so easily daunted, she proves herself and things start coming together. She even manages to convince the previous year’s star player Bird (Williamson, Forrest Gump) to give up his life of crime and rejoin the team.
On the domestic front, things aren’t so good. Her controlling ex-husband Frank (Keach, Moving Violations) hates that she’s coaching football at Central. He believes it will have a negative effect on Molly’s ability to raise their two daughters, 13YO Alice (Lively, The Karate Kid Part III) and 9YO Marian (Gold). Frank is an uptight jerk who’s never been supportive of anything that Molly wants to do. This time, she’s putting her foot down. She will NOT quit a job she loves to placate him. Of course, this will lead to a nasty custody battle where Molly is forced to choose between her daughters and her team. It will naturally come to a head at the big championship game at the end. NOT a spoiler, we know the Wildcats will make it to the championship.
Directed by Michael Ritchie (The Bad News Bears), Wildcats is comedy perfection. Hawn has always been a favorite of mine ever since I saw Foul Play on TV. She’s so darn lovable and spunky. And funny too. Her reactions to different situations, like when Frank tricks her into interviewing for a phys ed teacher position at a snobby private school for girls (the same one attended by his prissy girlfriend played to perfection by SNL’s Jan Hooks), are priceless. It helps greatly that she’s aided by a strong cast led by Swoosie Kurtz (Citizen Ruth) as her supportive sister. McGill is absolutely hateful as a chest-thumping chauvinist who calls all women “babe”. Russell is a riot as the principal who always says “Right!”
Then there’s the team. What a wild bunch! The one that stands out is Cerulo (Corri, A Nightmare on Elm Street) who likes to put dents in lockers…. with his head. Another stand-out is Finch (Thacker, Police Academy 4 & 5), a 400 lb. hulk who might be a good player if he actually played instead of accepting bribes from other teams to let them get by him. Wildcats also features early performances from Woody Harrelson (Cheers) and Wesley Snipes (Passenger 57) as team members. Who knew then they’d go on to co-star in the basketball comedy White Men Can’t Jump?
You could argue Wildcats makes a strong statement about feminism and you’d be right. It does. In that vein, it’s similar to Private Benjamin. It’s also a riotously funny football comedy with plenty of exciting gridiron action. It’ll have you cheering for the underdogs and for Molly as she asserts her independence from an ex-husband that can’t let go of the controls even though they’ve been divorced for several years. I can’t praise Wildcats enough. I love it. I love Goldie. I love the team. I love EVERYTHING about it. It’s one of two movie I watch every year on Superbowl Sunday (the other is The Last Boy Scout). How can it put it? Wildcats is roaring fun and I’m not lion…. I mean, lying.
