House of Gucci (2021)    Paramount/Drama    RT: 157 minutes    Rated R (language, some sexual content, brief nudity, violence)    Director: Ridley Scott    Screenplay: Becky Johnston and Roberto Bentivegna    Music: Harry Gregson-Williams    Cinematography: Dariusz Wolski    Release date: November 24, 2021 (US)    Cast: Lady Gaga, Adam Driver, Jared Leto, Jeremy Irons, Salma Hayek, Al Pacino, Jack Huston, Reeve Carney, Camille Cottin, Vincent Riotta, Alexia Murray, Mia McGovern Zaini, Florence Andrews, Madalina Diana Ghenea.

Rating: ** ½

 Ridley Scott’s drama House of Gucci is a film with a split personality. At times, it wants to be an epic-scale drama like The Godfather. Other times, it wants to be a trashy melodrama like The Other Side of Midnight and Bloodline. The result is a wildly uneven, overlong movie with occasional flashes of the campy greatness it could have achieved.

 A lot of things besides tonal inconsistency make House of Gucci one of the year’s biggest disappointments, but what really stings is it being the work of a filmmaker as talented as Scott. It’s his second film this year, the first being the box office dud The Last Duel, a good film marred by questionable casting choices (yes, I’m looking at you, Ben and Matt!). Casting isn’t the problem this time; House of Gucci has a great cast. The problem here is the performances; they’re all over the map. The actors can’t seem to reach a consensus on what kind of movie they’re in. I’ll explain further as I go.

 Based on factual events, House of Gucci tells a story of greed, decadence, betrayal, back-stabbing and murder. It all happens within the Gucci family, one of the biggest fashion houses in the world. It’s certainly one of the most well known. Into this already not quite functional family comes Patrizia (Lady Gaga), an attractive woman from a working-class family who has her sights set on bigger and better things. She meets Maurizio Gucci (Driver, The Last Duel), a law student, at a party and decides to make him hers. It isn’t long before they marry over the objections of his snobby father Rodolfo (Irons, Reversal of Fortune).

 Patrizia, in true Lady Macbeth fashion, wastes no time in encouraging her hubby to make a power grab and take over the family business. This means pushing out his uncle Aldo (Pacino, The Godfather) and dimwitted cousin Paolo (Leto, Dallas Buyers Club). Plenty of family and business drama happens over the years and it all leads to murder. Those familiar with the story already know that Maurizio was murdered in ’95 in a hit orchestrated by Patrizia and her confidante, psychic Pina (Hayek, Frida). House of Gucci follows the events leading up to it.

 In my opinion, House of Gucci works better when it situates itself in trashy melodrama territory. I’ve always had a fondness for dumb soapy movies like The Greek Tycoon. Sadly, Scott wants it to be taken seriously and that’s where it runs into problems. With the level of overacting displayed by Leto, how can you possibly take House of Gucci seriously? At the same time, Driver plays it straight by delivering a more grounded performance. Pacino basically plays Pacino at a slightly lower decibel. Irons camps it up as a former actor best described as an Italian Vincent Price. That’s how he comes off anyway. At the center of it all is Lady Gaga who offers up some hysterical overacting in a few scenes while sporting a accent that sounds more like an American imitating Gina Lollobrigida.

 The cinematography by Dariusz Wolski (The Last Duel) is very good, but it doesn’t make up for the slow pacing. I don’t mind long movies, but I do mind movies that feel long. House of Gucci runs only a minute longer than the recent Dune re-do, but feels much longer. It’s not that it’s entirely uninteresting; it just isn’t able to hold the viewer’s interest throughout. The period soundtrack is good, but why so many Donna Summer songs? Is the director a fan?

 I really, really wanted to like House of Gucci. It has so much going for it. I thought it would be a serious Oscar contender. Now I think The Last Duel has a better shot at garnering nominations. House of Gucci would have benefited from a tighter narrative and a more consistent tone. Either a serious drama or a campy soap opera, one or the other. Scott tries to have his cake and eat it too only to wind up with no dessert. It’s a huge letdown.

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