Little Fockers (2010) Universal-Paramount/Comedy RT: 98 minutes Rated PG-13 (mature sexual humor throughout, language, some drug content) Director: Paul Weitz Screenplay: John Hamburg and Larry Stuckey Music: Stephen Trask Cinematography: Remi Adefarasin Release date: December 22, 2010 (US) Cast: Ben Stiller, Robert De Niro, Owen Wilson, Dustin Hoffman, Barbara Streisand, Blythe Danner, Teri Polo, Jessica Alba, Laura Dern, Kevin Hart, Daisy Tahan, Colin Baiocchi, Tom McCarthy, Harvey Keitel, Yul Vasquez. Box Office: $148.4M (US)/$310.6M (World)
Rating: *
In my never-humble opinion, the hit comedy Meet the Parents is just okay. The sequel Meet the Fockers is a little better. The three-quel Little Fockers is focking terrible. How bad is it? When my wife and I saw it at the movies, she had no problem sneaking into a second movie afterwards without paying. Like me, she felt it was owed to us after the 98 minutes of torture we just endured. Keep in mind we’re talking about one of the most honest people in the world here. That she willingly became my partner-in-crime that afternoon says a lot about the power of bad cinema.
Third time is definitely not a charm in this crass, witless follow-up to the hit comedies centering on a never-ending battle of wits between hapless male nurse Greg Focker (Stiller, There’s Something About Mary) and his intense, ex-CIA father-in-law Jack Byrnes (De Niro, Taxi Driver). All the main players are back in Little Fockers along with the newest family members, twin Fockers Samantha (Tahan) and Henry (Baiocchi), the offspring of Greg and wife Pam (Polo, The Fosters). Once again, a visit with his in-laws – this time for the twins’ fifth birthday party- causes Greg to get into one humiliating situation after another as a result of stress stemming from his tense relationship with Jack. There’s something more on the line this time. By way of coming to terms with his mortality, Jack has decided to name Greg as the new head of the Byrnes clan, the “God-Focker” if you will. I know you see where this is going. The more Greg tries to impress his impossible-to-please father-in-law, the more he focks up.
A lot of embarrassing stuff happens to Greg over the course of Little Fockers, but none of it comes close to Jack’s mistaken belief that he’s having an affair with an attractive drug company rep named Andi Garcia (Alba, Sin City). He’s not; it’s strictly business. That’s the way he sees it, at least. He’s helping her promote a new erectile dysfunction pill called “Sustengo” in order to earn extra money so he can afford to enroll the twins in an exclusive pre-school. He’s the only one who can’t see Andi wants to fock his brains out.
It would be easier to tell you what works in Little Fockers than list its many faults. It’s not a long list; it contains only two items, Dustin Hoffman and Barbra Streisand. They play Greg’s parents Bernie and Roz. She’s a TV sex therapist who frequently talks about her son on her nationally televised show. He’s off in Spain learning how to flamenco dance. They’re the best things about Little Fockers even if they literally phone it in until the final 20 minutes. The only time I even cracked a smile is when they were around. It’s a fairly dismal affair otherwise.
Since I’ve already established how grossly unfunny Little Fockers is, let’s move on to other things. I have a real problem with Owen Wilson’s character, Pam’s ex-beau Kevin. He’s one of those annoying, nice guy, New Age-y overachievers who think they have the answers to all life’s problems. If you ask Jack, he’s the one that got away. He’d love it if Pam dumped Greg and married Kevin. He calls it a “course correction”. Here’s where I take issue. Is everybody (except Greg) so dense that they don’t see this guy for what he really is? He’s not a family friend, HE’S A FOCKING STALKER! He has a new tattoo of Pam on his back. What normal person does that? He’s an ideal candidate for a permanent restraining order. He needs to go away and stay gone.
By the looks of things, I’d have to say that Little Fockers is the victim of post-production tampering. It’s less a movie than a series of scenes strung together by the flimsiest of plotlines. It’s choppy and disjointed. It doesn’t flow smoothly. If you need more concrete proof, ask yourself why a star of Harvey Keitel’s stature is relegated to such a minor role. He plays a crooked contractor working on the house Greg just bought. His only significant scene is when he gets into it with De Niro’s character over the slow, slow progress of the renovations. His character serves absolutely NO purpose to the plot. Laura Dern (Blue Velvet) also gets the short shrift as the principal of the pre-school. Other than a few amusing reaction shots during the twins’ interviews, she doesn’t serve Little Fockers in any way. HOWEVER, if you want to talk about a really egregious waste of talent, I give you the divine Blythe Danner as Jack’s wife. She goes horribly underused.
If I was so inclined, I could easily describe Little Fockers in one word, LAME! Directed by Paul Weitz (About a Boy), every joke lands with a dull thud. He gives us tired gags involving bloody wounds, projectile vomiting and being caught in awkward positions, the worst being little Henry walking in on Greg giving Jack a shot of adrenaline after suffering an embarrassing side effect of Sustengo. Guess where he’s giving him the shot? Hint, it’s not the ass. The situations, some of which wouldn’t even cut it on an episode of Three’s Company, are devoid of humor. Personally, I don’t like movies where a well-meaning person keeps getting humiliated either by his own hand or someone else’s. It makes me feel uncomfortable. Stiller plays this character time and time again. Dude, it’s getting old. De Niro looks like he’s had it with playing Jack Byrnes. If I had to guess, I’d say he and several of his co-stars are simply fulfilling contractual obligations. They don’t really want to be here. I share their sentiment. This is one family reunion that should be avoided at all costs.
I simply cannot end my review without one more play on words. Here it is. Little Fockers is a complete fock-up.
