Zandalee (1991) ITC Entertainment/Drama-Thriller RT: 100 minutes Rated NC-17 (strong sexual content, full frontal nudity, language, some violence, drugs) Director: Sam Pillsbury Screenplay: Mari Kornhauser Music: Pray for Rain Cinematography: Walt Lloyd Release date: July 18, 1991 (US) Cast: Judge Reinhold, Nicolas Cage, Erika Anderson, Viveca Lindfors, Aaron Neville, Joe Pantoliano, Marisa Tomei, Steve Buscemi, Ian Abercrombie, Zach Galligan, Don Brady. Box Office: N/A
Rating: *** ½
I’ve always been a movie junkie. In the early 90s, I saw a lot of DTV (direct-to-video) titles courtesy of a friend who worked at a major video store. I can’t recall all the ones I watched, but I know for sure one of them wasn’t Zandalee. I surely would have remembered this one. It’s a gem of a bad movie. I would describe it as Sex Lies and Videotape reconceived as a Tennessee Williams drama with additional rewrites by director Zalman King, the guy behind softcore delights like Two Moon Junction (1988), Wild Orchid (1990) and Red Show Diaries (1992). If this doesn’t have the mouths of bad movie aficionados watering, somebody better check their pulse STAT.
Directed by Sam Pillsbury (Free Willy 3: The Rescue), Zandalee is an overheated slice of Southern-fried melodrama starring Judge Reinhold (Fast Times at Ridgemont High), Nicolas Cage (Moonstruck) and Erika Anderson (A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child). Before you go getting your hopes up, they never engage in a threesome. Oh well, you can’t have it all.
ANYWAY, the title Zandalee refers to the name of Anderson’s character. She’s the wife of Reinhold’s character Thierry, an unhappy sort who used to be a poet until his father’s death forced him to quit writing and take over the family business, a communications company. He feels smothered to the point of impotence, both emotionally and physically. He can no longer satisfy Zandalee, a very sexual being who we first meet dancing naked in her bedroom. I’ll tell you now; she gets naked A LOT in this movie. Hey, I’m not complaining. She has a nice body. I don’t mind looking. [Insert lecherous laugh]
Thierry goes to a bachelor party (MORE BOOBS!) where he runs into his old friend Johnny (Cage), a free-spirited artist who actually works for him as a cable guy. Is Thierry so out of touch that he doesn’t notice his friend’s name on the payroll? Fine, whatever, I’ll go along with it. He brings Johnny home to meet Zandalee and that’s where the trouble begins. She greets him frostily which can only mean she’s actually attracted to him. The feeling is mutual and it isn’t long before they start having an affair. They screw a lot. They do it outside in a rainstorm. They do it in the laundry room during a dinner party. They even do it in a church confessional. Zandalee more than earns its NC-17 rating.
Meanwhile, Thierry is so wrapped up in his own s*** that it takes him a while to realize what’s going on right under his nose. Or maybe he does realize but prefers to live in a state of denial. It’s never made clear which. Either way, he starts to lose it. He quits the job he hates and takes his wife on holiday in the Bayou (btw, the action is set in New Orleans) in hopes of repairing their damaged marriage. Johnny, now in full stalker mode after Zandalee ends their liaison, shows up. He’s waiting for them at this rinky-dink bait shop where Thierry stops to buy beer. This is when things really go south. We’re talking tragedy followed by another tragedy. No big surprise, a happy ending was never in the cards for these people.
There’s no shortage of supporting characters in Zandalee. Thierry’s grandmother Tatta (Lindfors, The Exorcist III) lives with the unhappy couple. She’s involved with a distinguished fellow named Louis (Abercrombie, Army of Darkness). Zandalee’s best friend Gerri (Pantoliano, Risky Business) is a drag queen who hangs out at the vintage clothing shop she runs, offering up advice and support. Steve Buscemi (Reservoir Dogs), in an early role, plays an inmate garbage collector who hangs around on the periphery of the action. R&B singer Aaron Neville shows up in a non-musical role playing a bartender who has shady business dealings with Johnny. Pre-Oscar win Marisa Tomei (My Cousin Vinny) shows up briefly as Johnny’s ditzy dinner party date. Zach Galligan (Gremlins 1 & 2) makes a couple of quick appearances as a fellow artist who critiques Johnny’s paintings.
Cage gives one of the loopiest performances of his distinguished career in Zandalee. Johnny is a real piece of work. He looks like the grunge love child of Elvis and Louis Cyphre (Robert De Niro’s character from Angel Heart) with the goatee and that mullet. It bears mentioning that he’s a part-time drug dealer in addition to cable guy/artist. He positively oozes ill intent as the personification of temptation. He goes full Nic Cage in the scene where loses it and covers himself in black paint. It’s an epic Cage freak-out! He also gets off the best lines in the film. Here are a few samples:
“I wanna shake you naked and eat you alive.” [Words guaranteed to make a girl swoon]
“Without creativity, without life, then you are truly unable to go straight up the devil’s ass, look him in the face, and smile.” [What does that even mean?]
“When I’m inside you. I feel lost at the edge of the universe. Travelling, exploring. Roll over on your stomach. And we’ll f*** like animals. In the altar of the primal.” [Deep, isn’t it?]
“When I go in my kitchen to make toast. I smell your skin. I can’t get you out of me.” [Butter or jam?]
“It’s pretty hard to hide the clairvoyance of the eyes.” [Again, what does this even mean?]
“You wanna share my peach?”
He says that last one to Thierry during a tense meeting in his office where they talk around the real reason for the face-to-face. I find myself wondering if this is an allusion to the serpent offering up forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden.
Reinhold, sporting a moustache and amusing New Orleans accent, delivers a performance as a clueless cuckold that borders on parody. The dumbstruck expression on his face as he slowly figures out what might be going on between his wife and friend in the next room during the dinner party is priceless. His freak-out isn’t as epic as his co-star’s. It’s a little more grounded, but still falls within the bounds of bad acting.
Let me just get this out of the way. Anderson is a total fox. She also turns in the best performance of the three leads. She’s close to convincing as an unhappy woman stuck in a stagnant marriage. She jogs to blow off steam. When she starts up with Johnny, she goes to church to seek absolution only to be met with more temptation.
Let’s talk about the sex now. It’s abundant and it’s HOT! I love how Zandalee slips out of her panties while stand-screwing Johnny in the rain. The confessional booth scene should have a few Catholics frothing at the mouth. Then there’s the scene where Johnny paints her naked body. It’s sexy and unintentionally funny at the same time. As for the nudity, I have only two words: FULL FRONTAL.
It’s always fun discovering a great bad movie. I can’t believe I didn’t watch Zandalee sooner. This one is thoroughly demented. The funniest part is that the makers apparently thought they were making a serious drama. That’s what makes a bad movie truly stand out. I highly recommend Zandalee to the select few who groove on the best-worst cinema has to offer.
