Fist Fight (2017) Warner Bros./Comedy RT: 91 minutes Rated R (language throughout, sexual content, nudity, drug material) Director: Richie Keen Screenplay: Van Robichaux and Evan Susser Music: Dominic Lewis Cinematography: Eric Alan Edwards Release date: February 17, 2017 (US) Cast: Charlie Day, Ice Cube, Tracy Morgan, Jillian Bell, Dean Norris, Christina Hendricks, Kumail Nanjiani, Dennis Haysbert, JoAnna Garcia Swisher, Alexa Nisenson, Kym Whiteley, Austin Zajur, Stephanie Weir, Gordon Danniels, Bill Kottkamp. Box Office: $32.2M (US)/$41.1M (World)
Rating: **
If you grew up in the 80s then you probably remember a little teen comedy called Three O’Clock High. It only aired about a million times on cable. That, of course, is a rough estimate. Fist Fight is essentially a remake of the 1987 movie with teachers instead of students. The premise is nearly identical (save for a few additional plot details) with a weaker teacher trying to get out of an after-school parking lot fight with a colleague known for his intimidating tactics.
I had a bad feeling about this one from the get-go. The trailer told me everything I needed to know. First, like most other comedies these days, it relies on crudeness rather than actual comedy in an attempt to make audiences laugh. The mere mention by a guidance counselor of her crystal meth habit isn’t automatically funny. Second, it stars Charlie Day (Horrible Bosses), an actor-comedian who has roughly the same effect on me as fingernails on a chalkboard. This guy is ANNOYING! I really don’t understand his appeal. Third, Three O’Clock High is a great movie. It’s clever, original and funny. Fist Fight is none of these things. It’s crude, mean-spirited and repetitive. I did laugh once and I’ll explain more about that in a moment. The point I’m trying to make is that there was really no reason to make this movie.
It’s the last day of school at Roosevelt High and the teachers should be happy. The students are a bunch of monsters. Apparently, the last day of school is also Prank Day which means the kids torture their teachers more than usual with practical jokes involving horses amped-up on meth running through the halls, booby traps that squirt paint and outlines of male genitalia on the football field. They’re like a wacky version of the student body of Eastside High (Lean on Me). The teachers should be happy but they’re all worried about losing their jobs. The school is doing cutbacks meaning that they’re firing teachers left and right. All of them are fair game.
Day plays Andy Campbell, a nice-guy English teacher that everybody walks all over. His colleagues and student neither respect nor like him but he doesn’t seem to notice. Talk about bad days, this poor schlemiel is having the worst. Besides the prospect of impending unemployment, his very pregnant wife (Swisher, Reba) is due to give birth at any time and he promised his insecure preteen daughter (Nisenson, Middle School: The Worst Years of My Life) that he’ll perform with her in her school’s talent show that afternoon. A situation arises at work and Andy is forced to choose between saving his own job or that of a colleague. Naturally, he opts for the former which puts him in very deep doo-doo with said colleague, temperamental history teacher Ron Strickland (Ice Cube, Friday). Did I say temperamental? I meant insane! We’re talking about a guy who goes after a prankster student with a fire axe. Anyway, Strickland challenges Andy to a fist fight at 3 o’clock in the school parking lot. Andy spends the rest of the school day looking for a way to get out of it.
I watched the first hour or so of Fist Fight in a state of irritation. Rarely have I seen so many unlikable characters assembled into one 90-minute movie. I didn’t like a single person in Fist Fight, not even the so-called hero of the piece. After five minutes, I understood completely why anybody would want to beat up Day’s character. He’s a twerp. How can you root for a guy who you want to see get his ass kicked? It kind of defeats the purpose of the movie. Ice Cube’s character is a cross between psycho and street thug. Many rumors about his life before teaching circulate; depending on who’s telling the story, he was either a street gang enforcer or a Special Ops killer. Either way, he’s nothing more than a workplace bully. While I didn’t really like his character, I did like him better than Andy. Ice Cube, with that million-dollar scowl and million-mile glare, is the better actor. He basically serves the same function here as he does in the Ride Along movies, he makes it bearable.
As for the rest of the talented cast, they’re basically wasted in Fist Fight. Bell (The Night Before) plays guidance counselor Holly, an admitted drug user and sexual predator. When she isn’t talking about coming to work wasted, she openly talks about lusting after one of her male students. While tasteless and wrong, a character like this could be funny if the writing was any good. It’s not so she isn’t. Morgan (30 Rock) as a gym teacher plays himself. His character really serves no purpose. Neither does the one played by Christina Hendricks (Mad Men). She shows up a few times, makes a few threatening gestures and that’s it. There’s no rhyme or reason with the supporting characters. It’s the same problem the movie has as a whole.
Fist Fight is pretty bad up to a point. Then a funny thing happens (literally). Predictably, a crucial meeting with the principal ends up conflicting with the daughter’s talent show. This means a lot of racing around as Andy tries to do both. We’ve seen this exact same scenario before. The funny thing is the performance itself. Andy decides they should scrap their original number and do this rap song by Big Sean instead. It’s what the kid wanted all along. They never mention the name of the song. If you thought Abigail Breslin’s pageant scene in Little Miss Sunshine was wrong, wait until you get a load of what goes down at the talent show here. OMG, it’s so freaking wrong and so freaking hysterical. It’s a lead-in to the climactic fight with is actually well-executed. There’s some good physical comedy on display.
Amidst all the crudeness, vulgarity and f-bombs, there’s a message about standing up for yourself AND a statement about the current state of public education. Like Henry Winkler’s character in 1982’s Night Shift, something finally makes Andy snap and fight back against all the bullies in his life. Okay, I can get behind that. Given that it’s the age of technology and social media, the teacher fight goes viral and becomes a symbol of everything that’s wrong with the public education system. Okay, whatever. Maybe it’s just me but the idea of a movie as inconsequential as Fist Fight having a social conscience feels forced and false. In the end, it’s just not a good movie. It’s not as funny as it thinks it is. Director Richie Keen, making his feature film debut, still has a lot to learn. Most of the jokes land with a thud. It’s not the worst comedy I’ve seen but it’s no comedy knock-out either.