Yor: The Hunter from the Future (1983) Columbia Pictures/Action-Adventure-Sci-Fi-Fantasy RT: 88 minutes Rated PG (violence, scantily-clad cavewomen) Director: Anthony M. Dawson (Antonio Margheriti) Screenplay: Robert D. Bailey and Anthony M. Dawson Music: Guido De Angelis, Maurizio De Angelis and John Scott Cinematography: Marcello Masciocchi Release date: August 19, 1983 (US) Cast: Reb Brown, Corinne Clery, Alan Collins, Carole Andre, John Steiner. Box Office: $2.8M (US)
Rating: *** ½
The 80s sure gave us some crazy bad movies (e.g. Hercules, Can’t Stop the Music, Supergirl), but none as gleefully whacked-out as Yor: The Hunter from the Future, an Italian import that came and went in August ’83. Hardly anybody turned out to see former college football player Reb Brown as the eponymous prehistoric hero. Prior to Yor, his most notable role was superhero Captain America in a couple of TV movies in ’79.
Yor was in and out of theaters so quickly I almost missed it and would have if the local $1 movie house (the good old Waverly Theater in Drexel Hill, PA) hadn’t shown it as part of a double feature with Krull. I hadn’t yet seen either movie, a real rarity. There was no way I was missing out on this one. There was a pretty good-sized crowd that Friday night (September 23) and I was right in the thick of it. Yor was the first feature and the audience cheerfully clapped along to the movie’s rocking theme song (“Yor’s World”). It didn’t take them long to start groaning and shouting wise cracks. At least one of my neighbors sparked up a joint. I was loving it! I knew Yor would be bad, but I didn’t know it would be this hilariously bad. Why the studio didn’t bill it as a comedy is beyond me. For the next 88 minutes, I was in bad movie heaven.
When we first meet our hero, he’s running and jumping around the stone towers in Cappadocia (the movie was shot in Turkey) as the theme song plays over the soundtrack. For his second act of bravery (the first being agreeing to star in this turkey from Turkey), he saves sexy cavegirl Kala (Clery, The Story of O) and her much older protector Pag (Collins, Blood and Black Lace) from a fake Stego-Ceratops. He easily dispatches it with his trusty stone axe. By way of appreciation, the other villagers invite him to feast and party with them. The women, including Kala, dance and twirl in bamboo skirts like prehistoric showgirls or the first Solid Gold dancers of record.
The party gets cut short by invaders, rival cavemen with bluish skin, who kidnap Kala and the other women. In order to rescue her, Yor invents hang gliding by soaring in on a pair of wings taken from a giant bat. He successfully rescues her, after which she and Pag accompany him on his quest to discover his origins. All he has to go on is a mysterious medallion that he wears around his neck. It turns out that a desert-dwelling woman (Andre, Death in Venice) wears a similar medallion. She reigns over a society of sand mummies and is rumored to be a sorceress, but she might be able to help Yor.
Okay, let me skip over a few things and get to the big surprise PLOT TWIST. Actually, it’s not much of a surprise at all since the title gives it away. It turns out that Yor comes from a futuristic society ruled by the evil Overlord (Steiner, Caligula) and the world he knows is actually a post-apocalyptic Earth. Now that he’s returned, he’s to lead a rebellion against this Overlord guy.
Yor ranks alongside Plan 9 from Outer Space in its sheer stupidity and ineptitude. It’s so cheap-looking I can’t believe a major studio distributed it. The prehistoric beasties look like half-assed Ray Harryhausen creations. While filmed in Turkey, most of the movie looks like it was shot at some national park. The futuristic society resembles something from one of those cerebral sci-fi movies of the 70s (e.g. THX 1138, Zardoz). The special effects are on par with a live-action Saturday morning kid show. The plot is as dopey as they come. The dialogue follows suit with choice lines like “I’m afraid death rules this land” and “The gods must be appeased with fresh blood”.
The acting is bad across the board. Brown looks like he just stepped off a California beach with his blonde hair (an all-too-obvious wig) and tan. He should be carrying a surfboard instead of a stone weapon. He’s the end result of a meeting of beefcake and meathead.
Yor gets increasingly dumber as the story progresses. I think it’s a riot! So what if it’s slow-moving at times? It’s the kind of bad movie that’s worth seeing at least once in your lifetime. It’s a shame that many in the audience that night didn’t seem to agree. Several folks made their feelings perfectly clear with their brief, profane critiques. My friend commented that it was the dumbest movie he ever saw. I think that’s precisely the point of a movie like Yor. Would it surprise you to learn that it’s a condensed version of a four-part miniseries shown on Italian television? I’d sure like to know what they cut out.
By way of conclusion, I’d like to point out that there’s one line that perfectly describes the experience of watching Yor at the Waverly that night. While building a raft, somebody says “We will need a lot more hemp before we’re through”. It would appear that some in the audience agreed with that statement judging by the wicked contact high that lasted through most of Krull.
