Bedroom Eyes (1984) Double Helix Films/Suspense-Thriller RT: 93 minutes Rated R (strong sexual content, nudity, language, some violence) Director: William Fruet Screenplay: Michael Alan Eddy Music: Paul Hoffert and John Tucker Cinematography: Miklos Lente Release date: September 26, 1986 (Philadelphia, PA) Cast: Kenneth Gilman, Dayle Haddon, Christine Cattell, Lawrence K. Philips, Jayne Catling, Alf Humphreys, Angus MacInnes, Nick Nichols, Barbara Law. Box Office: N/A
Rating: ***
I actually saw the erotic thriller Bedroom Eyes at the movies. Never one to pass up a trashy B-movie, I saw it at the City Line Theater on a Monday night with a friend courtesy of free passes given to me by one of my bosses at ACME. I knew it would be a one-week wonder, but I never expected it would show up on cable a mere few months later. Naturally, I decided to watch it again. It then hit me that the Canadian-made potboiler was right where it belonged. It’s tailor-made for the late night Cinemax crowd. It’s the kind of movie that needs to be watched in the dark between 11pm and 2am in order to get the full effect.
In addition, it also anticipated the lucrative home video trend that would rise a few years hence. Viewers felt more comfortable watching racy movies like Bedroom Eyes in the privacy of their own homes. By the early 90s, video store shelves were lined with low-budget, DTV erotic thrillers bearing titles like Fatal Charm, Naked Obsession and Killer Instinct. So endeth the history lesson.
Plot is not a top priority in these movies. The main selling point, as you may have guessed, is the softcore sex and nudity. There’s an ample amount of both in Bedroom Eyes. There’s also a semblance of a plot centering on a voyeur who witnesses a murder. It all starts when Ontario stockbroker Harry Ross (Gilman, Nights in White Satin) is out jogging late one night. He’s drawn to a house where he watches a sexy woman get undressed through the window. He likes it so much, he returns several more times before realizing he might be a pervert. Guilt compels him to consult a psychiatrist, Dr. Alex Barnes (Haddon, North Dallas Forty), about his new obsession. He ends the session by asking her out. She says she’d prefer to maintain a strictly professional relationship. How long do you think that’ll last?
What happens next is one of the highlights of Bedroom Eyes. Harry takes a girl (Cattell, The Kinky Coaches and the Pom-Pom Pussycats) out to dinner at a fancy restaurant. Coincidentally, Dr. Alex is seated at a nearby table with her date. Harry’s date is hot and horny. She starts by removing her panties and handing them to him. Next, she guides his fingers to her [fill in your preferred term] and plays a little bit before asking for his foot so she can finish the job. All the while, Dr. Alex is watching.
Proving he’s every bit as dumb as he is perverted, Harry ditches the sure thing at her front door and dons his jogging outfit so he can play peeping tom once more. This is when the proverbial s*** hits the fan. The object of his obsession has been murdered, presumably by the guy who was standing over her just minutes before. Harry freaks and runs off, leaving all sorts of physical evidence (e.g. fingerprints on the window, a half-smoked cigarette, sneaker prints) at the scene. He makes an anonymous 911 call at a pay phone before driving off. BTW, it bears mentioning he’s been ticketed for illegal parking umpteen times. He’s as good as f***ed and not in the fun sense of the word.
It doesn’t take the cops too long to zero in on Harry who hides out at Alex’s place while she tries to come up with a way to prove his innocence. She hypnotizes him, but it’s really nothing more than a ploy by the filmmakers to insert more softcore footage. They end up in bed, of course. Meanwhile, the real killer is stalking Harry, waiting for the perfect opportunity to silence him for good. The end of Bedroom Eyes isn’t much of a payoff. The identity of the killer won’t come as much of a shock. In fact, it’s treated in a rather offhand manner. The killer’s motive is both convoluted and arbitrary.
I’m a critic NOT a used car salesman, so I won’t try and convince you Bedroom Eyes is anything but a piece of junk. It’s a sleazy, lurid, little movie that owes a great deal to Hitchcock and DePalma, Rear Window and Body Double in particular. It’s directed by William Fruet, a big name in Canuxploitation with titles like The House by the Lake, Search and Destroy, Funeral Home, Spasms and Killer Party to his credit. He does a passable job here. Bedroom Eyes has style, I’ll give it that. The sex scenes are well done. They’re sufficiently provocative. Unfortunately, it lacks any real suspense. The screenplay by Michael Alan Eddy is littered with clichés. It’s fairly predictable (that goes for the “surprise” twist in the finale as well) which is par for the course for DTV erotic thrillers.
The acting is pretty bad, especially by the leads. Gilman makes a rather bland protagonist while Haddon is about as convincing as a psychiatrist as Denise Richards is a nuclear physicist in The World Is Not Enough. Between them, they generate zero chemistry. Some of the dialogue is laughable. The cops investigating the murder are idiots. Come to think of it, Bedroom Eyes is populated almost entirely by idiots. The smartest character might be the killer although to go so long without being caught could just be dumb luck.
Bedroom Eyes has a lot of faults, but I can forgive them all. Why? It never pretends to be anything other than what it is. In fact, it excels at what it is. It should definitely satisfy its intended audience, late night viewers looking for a thrill or two. It’s more watchable than most of its kind. It might even discourage potential peeping toms.
