{"id":2222,"date":"2024-08-10T14:57:51","date_gmt":"2024-08-10T14:57:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/?p=2222"},"modified":"2024-10-13T19:30:53","modified_gmt":"2024-10-13T23:30:53","slug":"red-sonja","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/2024\/08\/10\/red-sonja\/","title":{"rendered":"Red Sonja"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"Red Sonja<\/strong> (1985)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 MGM\/Fantasy-Action-Adventure\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 RT: 89 minutes\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Rated PG-13 (some graphic violence, brief rape scene)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Director: Richard Fleischer\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Screenplay: Clive Exton and George MacDonald Fraser\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Music: Ennio Morricone\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Cinematography: Giuseppe Rotunno\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Release date: July 3, 1985 (US)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Cast: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Brigitte Nielsen, Sandahl Bergman, Paul L. Smith, Ernie Reyes Jr., Ronald Lacey, Pat Roach, Terry Richards, Janet Agren, Donna Osterbuhr, Lara Naszinsky, Tutte Lemkow.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Box Office: $6.9M (US)<\/p>\n

Rating<\/strong>: ** \u00bd<\/p>\n

\u00a0Arnold Schwarzenegger receives top billing in Red Sonja<\/strong> playing a character named Kalidor, a warrior and stand-in for Conan understandably keeping a low profile after Conan the Destroyer destroyed the franchise. The actual star of Red Sonja<\/strong> is Brigitte Nielsen, a model making her acting debut as the title character in this super-cheesy slice of sword-and-sorcery silliness from uber-producer Dino DeLaurentiis of the Conan movies.<\/p>\n

\u00a0Like Conan, the character of Red Sonja was originally created by Robert E. Howard and set in the same universe as the more popular sword-slinging hero. Her origin isn\u2019t too different. Her mission of revenge begins with the murder of her family by the evil sorceress Queen Gedren (Bergman, Conan the Barbarian). She\u2019s a vicious bitch, this one. Not only does she have Sonja\u2019s family butchered, she also allows her troops to rape the innocent girl. It\u2019s in retaliation for Sonja rejecting Gedren\u2019s sexual advances. Left for dead, a goddess named Scathach appears to Sonja after hearing her cry for vengeance and grants her powers- increased strength, stamina and agility- that will help her achieve her goal.<\/p>\n

\u00a0Year later, a group of priestesses is about to destroy a large, glowing, green orb they call \u201cThe Talisman\u201d. It\u2019s becoming too powerful for them to handle and must be destroyed before it ends the world. Before they can do it, Gedren and her forces attack their temple, kill everybody and take the Talisman. One priestess (Agren, City of the Living Dead) manages to escape, but is mortally wounded in the process. She asks Kalidor to find her sister Sonja so she can finish the job. You see, the Talisman can only be touched by women. If a man touches it, he\u2019s history.<\/p>\n

\u00a0By now, Red Sonja (so named for her flaming red hair) is a swordmaster with an intense hatred of men. It makes sense, especially after what happened to her in her youth. Also, the powers gifted to her came with a condition. She is not to be with ANY man unless he can beat her in combat. ANYWAY, Kalidor brings her to her sister who dies shortly after telling her about Gedren. With her resolve further strengthened, Sonya sets off to find her mortal enemy and end her along with the magical orb. Although she refuses Kalidor\u2019s offer to help (she doesn\u2019t need any man\u2019s help), he follows and jumps in as needed.<\/p>\n

\u00a0Along the way, Sonja picks up a couple of traveling companions, spoiled Prince Tarn (Reyes, The Last Dragon) and his faithful servant Falkon (Smith, Dune), in a city destroyed by Gedren. The prince is a royal pain in the ass. He\u2019s a rude little brat who treats everybody with disrespect, even kindly Falkon who would die in his place if necessary. What this kid needs is a woman\u2019s touch…. right across his backside. He almost gets it too. Meanwhile, Kalidor keeps showing up at just the right moments. It turns out he has a personal stake in the destruction of the Talisman too.<\/p>\n

\u00a0I won\u2019t lie or mince words, Red Sonja <\/strong>is a bad movie. It looks cheap. Its low budget shows in every frame. The effects are beyond cheesy. The destruction of kingdoms always occur off-camera; all we get to see is the aftermath. It relies heavily on miniatures and matte shots. The scene where the actors fight a mechanical water monster is unintentionally hilarious. The cinematography by Giuseppe Rotunno reminds one of the cheap, Italian-made sword-and-sandal epics of the 60s featuring the likes of Steve Reeves.<\/p>\n

\u00a0The acting in Red Sonja<\/strong> is horrendous. It makes you question how Nielsen continued to work in film after her monstrously bad performance in the lead role. Oh wait, I do know. She was involved with Sylvester Stallone with whom she subsequently co-starred in Rocky IV and Cobra. I\u2019m sure he had a hand in keeping her employed during the short duration of their marriage. Her performance level did not increase along with her resume. She looks HOT in Red Sonja<\/strong>, no question about it, but her acting ability leaves a lot to be desired.<\/p>\n

\u00a0Bergman camps it up mightily as the Sapphic sovereign who wears a mask to cover the ugly scar given to her by Sonja back in the days. The lesbian overtones in this movie aren\u2019t what you\u2019d call subtle. They couldn\u2019t be any clearer if they came accompanied by big flashing neon letters. Schwarzenegger plays his role with a combination of stoicism and bemusement. Reyes is all but insufferable as the brattiest kid this side of David Mendenhall\u2019s character in Over the Top. Smith is surprisingly good as the faithful servant who withstands the verbal slings and arrows fired by the prepubescent prince. Ronald Lacey (Raiders of the Lost Ark) hams it up as Gedren\u2019s right-hand man.<\/p>\n

\u00a0Some of the dialogue in Red Sonja<\/strong> must be heard to be believed. Even then, it\u2019s still hard to believe the characters are actually speaking these lines with straight faces. When faced with the power of the Talisman, Bergman exclaims, \u201cSo it is true, only women may touch it.\u201d Or how about this pick-up line from Kalidor: \u201cIf you yield only to a conqueror, then prepare to be conquered.\u201d Ah, the words every prehistoric chick longs to hear. If I didn\u2019t know any better, I\u2019d swear Red Sonja <\/strong>is a comedy.<\/p>\n

\u00a0Who, other than Sir Dino, is responsible for this hunk of cinematic junk? The director is Richard Fleischer whose filmography also includes The Jazz Singer, Amityville 3D and Conan the Destroyer. Wait a minute, Dino invited him back after he screwed up on the last Conan movie? Who knew the film tycoon was so forgiving? Then again, this is the same guy that insisted \u201cwhen the monkey die, people gonna cry\u201d in an interview for his King Kong remake in \u201976. It\u2019s written by Clive Exton (the 1980 mummy movie The Awakening) and George MacDonald Fraser (1973\u2019s The Three Musketeers). Together, they concoct a sword-and-sorcery movie of supreme silliness.<\/p>\n

\u00a0In the film\u2019s defense, Ennio Morricone (the Man with No Name trilogy) provides a wonderful score and the sword work is quite good. The actors were trained by sword master Kiyoshi Yamasaki who worked on both Conan flicks. What can I say? I love a good sword fight, especially ones where heads fly and blood flows freely from gaping wounds. There\u2019s some of the red sticky stuff in Red Sonja<\/strong>, but its PG-13 rating keeps it on the conservative side.<\/p>\n

\u00a0One of the funniest things in Red Sonja<\/strong> is found in the opening titles which state that this movie is the beginning of her adventures. How very presumptuous of the makers. Did they really believe this junker would jump-start a new franchise? Now that\u2019s what I call chutzpah!<\/p>\n

\u00a0Here\u2019s the deal. Red Sonja<\/strong> is fun in the way a good bad movie without the MST3K or RiffTrax treatment is fun. It\u2019s never more laughable than when it tries to take itself seriously. It\u2019s easily one of the stupidest S&S movies I\u2019ve ever seen including 1982\u2019s Sorceress. It\u2019s not enough to shut off your brain while watching it; you have to forget the concept of human intelligence altogether.\"\"<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Red Sonja (1985)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 MGM\/Fantasy-Action-Adventure\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 RT: 89 minutes\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Rated PG-13 (some graphic violence, brief rape scene)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Director: Richard Fleischer\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Screenplay: Clive Exton and George MacDonald Fraser\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Music: Ennio Morricone\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Cinematography: Giuseppe Rotunno\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Release date: July 3, 1985 (US)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Cast: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Brigitte Nielsen, Sandahl Bergman, Paul L. Smith, Ernie Reyes Jr., Ronald Lacey, Pat Roach, Terry […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3142,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2222","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-guilty-pleasures","category-sci-fi-fantasy"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/Red-Sonja-PIC.jpg?fit=620%2C348&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2222","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2222"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2222\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3143,"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2222\/revisions\/3143"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3142"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2222"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2222"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/movieguy247.com\/MovieGuy\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2222"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}